Prana Makes Powerful T-Shirts /// And They’re Not Entirely Useless

Holy crap, this is an amazingly special t-shirt, my friends!

According to prAna’s latest catalog, the sexy lil’ number known as the “Leah Tee” actually has the ability to capture “the essence of the goddess within,” proving once again that you can pretty much say whatever your tight lil’ yoga bum wants in this funny lil’ society, and we’ll all go along for the ride with only the slightest sense of feeling poo-poo inside for doing so.

But, really. Is what prAna claims even possible? I mean, that’s a lie, right? It’s not like some over-priced piece of China-manufactured clothing (read prAna’s apologetics here) can actually capture the essence of anything, let alone contain the essence of the primordial rupturing of worldly dualism through the beautiful cosmic feminine chaos known as the Goddess. I mean, for Goddess sake, it only comes in two colors: “meadowbrook” and “orchid!” WTF?

Now, don’t get me wrong. Yogic texts have made some fantastic claims throughout history (all of which I believe). And, many of us have held or touched objects (relics, murtis, etc.) which contained felt-seeds of ephemeral cosmic power. And yet, never have I bought a t-shirt from an active lifestyle catalog made of “lightweight burnout fabric” that gave me anything more than a feeling of guilt for having spent $50 on said item.

But, it’s not like the Leah Tee has no use-value. You, as well as I, know that the kinda see-through fabric and “scoop neck,” along with the “side contouring” which apparently creates “a feminine silhouette,” will defs provide yoga boys and their post-op trans friends with plenty of projected imagery while practicing Mantak Chia’s seed retention techniques on the old lingam. Just remember, kids. Channel it up the spine. Channel. It. Up. The Spine!