Sadie on “Creating Your Own Life” /// And Other Forms of Manufactured Rebelliousness

SadieMex-618x618

You know how guys who smoke cigars are automatically the worst people on the planet? Here’s a recent super-short Q&A with weight-loss yogini and “rockstar,” Sadie Nardini, who dishes out…well…something that maybe could be called digestable….

“A Beer with Sadie Nardini: Midwestern Values, Shaving Your Head & Creating your Life”

As far as I’ve ever seen, Yoganonymous is a quagmire of ridiculous web filler, so it’s really hard to tell when they’ve edited a piece to shambles, or pub’d something that hasn’t been eviscerated by the regurgitation sound-byte mill. As such, I can’t tell if this is a direct quote from our Lady, or some bastardization of such. As it stands, it’s pretty awesome.

And, I quote:

I have my own LLC that’s worth half a million dollars a year. I respect myself. To fellow yoga teachers, I’d say, we are kind of gypsies by nature and I don’t expect the corporate world to understand that.

So, let me get this straight. You’re LLC is a financial success and you respect yourself? What does that mean??? You’d like to tell yoga teachers that they’re all gypsies? Like, because you move around or because you are poor Romani people? Or, is it because yoga instructors are a very stereotypical group of people? And, why exactly won’t the corporate world understand this wisdom? What’s going on here??? This sounds like some sort of ideological catch-all trying to net as many readers as possible. I’m a wandering gypsie. I’m rich. I’m a mystic. I love myself. I laugh at the corporate world, but I have a Limited Liability Corporation.

Easy there, tiger. Just take a breath….

To be honest, following the way in which this quote gets across its message, which I’m guessing has something to do with being a commercial “rebel”?, makes me kinda giddy. Not, good-giddy, but that kind of giddy I get when I’m in the presence of some Boulder-ite Landmark graduate. You know the kind? Those super-posi actualizers of their own destiny, who first disassociate themselves from anyone who might get in the way of their personal success, and then couch the entire process in a slurry of “personal truths” and sustained eye contact.

Ah, but there’s more!

Then we went to the cabana, drank mezcal, smoked a Cuban cigar and shaved my head. We’re the real world yoga couple, if you will. Being in the world and also not of it. The only way to roll.

Hmmm…. “Be in the world, but not of it.” The earliest Christians said it. Wandering Muslim Sufis rock it. And now, this television personality proclaims it. Oh, and by “shave head” I think she’s referring to a tiny patch on the side. You know, like that twenty-year-old in Williamsburg busted out three years ago….

Good morning, cholita.

Good morning, cholita.

So, don’t go getting your hopes up that the mane came off.

Good afternoon, Britney.

Good afternoon, Britney.

Eh, but who am I to judge? Here’s two points I’m gonna make instead:

1. If you’re one of these yoga people who thinks that living an unhealthy lifestyle is antithetical to being a yoga practitioner, or that somehow getting the prerequisite amount of leafy greens is somehow related to “realization,” stop being an idiot. You’re way off. Yoga peeps far more intense than you are getting drunk and smoking cigarettes right now, indoors, in front of children, next to a burning pile of trash. Put that bowl of tasteless quinoa down, and learn yourself some knowledge.

2. But, being a social derelict does not a radical make. You can’t just practice yoga and go do Jager shots all night and expect someone like me, who might know a thing or two, to care a rat’s vagina about what you gotta say. You gotta show and prove, son. If you ain’t got anything dope to say, and your game is just a bunch of business wrapped up in a pretty little yoga facade, than you donning a three-years-too-late hairstyle and sucking down one of the most offensive smelling jaw-amputators known to douche bag dudes the world over ain’t gonna save you.

Stop frontin’ and be a person already. You’re f*ing boring.

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27 comments

  1. Yoganonymous? You kidding? That’s just Facebook-style self-promotion for yoga teachers who are literate, and actually know how to blog!

  2. Garuda

    I am not sure what the Yoga faction that calls themselves ‘Gypsies’ is talking about but I will venture to guess that it’s is because they move from studio to studio to studio to studio with their trendiness and pre-tents looking for just enough marginalized peeps to follow them around so they can call them ‘My Students’. If you change your fashion in a radical way now and again, the students will follow suit or drop from the most honored status as quickly as you can say middle school clique.
    Alcohol and tobacco and ganga dont kill yogis, nor do they make them more or less interesting. As a yoga instructor, it is my mission to expose my heart to the students in such a way that they can see the real me. I am a fraud like everyone else to be honest. Me and my ‘better than Sadie’ attitudes wont get me home either any more than my whiskey and pipe.

  3. Yoga_Dude

    I knew it, defying physics has consequences!

  4. Jag

    Sadie is awesome!

  5. Greenpoint

    Her rap, style(or lack thereof really) is boring beyond words to describe…nothing to see here folks, move along…

  6. Harmony

    Wow. I wish she would educate herself about yoga a bit more.
    See Sadie, there’s a very cool, and much cooler trend happening in yoga these days, for teachers and students. It’s called being a Householder. That does not at all mean owning a house, or thinking of a long-term dwelling (I can feel you shudder at that one!)

    Householders do the real spiritual ‘gangsta’ work, on the pavement, in the corn fields, in the studio, and more than anything, do it humbly, quietly, in private or in small groups, but live grounded lives within and because of their spiritual practices. There’s no posting their new hairdo to get attention. I was actually admiring you Sadie cause you’ve been quiet these past months. I got excited for you, like you actually discovered some great practices.

  7. Yoga Whelp

    Corporate America is actually filled to the brim with “gypsies,” but they’re usually called “traveling salesmen.” They’re all over Bumfuck America lugging their product from one “no-tell” motel to another, doing cheesy product demonstrations, eating fast food, and spending long sleepless nights in their underwear passing gas and watching pay-porn.

    • The P

      Everybody knows you can’t watch pay-porn on a business trip because the finance department will catch that on the bill and you will land in trouble. They also won’t let you include any booze in your per diem .. basturds

    • Garuda

      Imagine the possibilities of pay-porn. Selling advert space where a tramp stamp would be. Like a green screen. Or maybe Trump could team up with Ron Jeremy and they could co-produce Americas next great porn star reality show ” The Porn Apprentice”…Oh wait, The Bachelor is already filling that need.

      • Yoga Whelp

        Yoga “porn” is a growing part of the porn industry. There are entire web sites devoted to faux-yoginis rocking their bums with guys in various yoga poses. There’s also XXX video chat which could easily be converted to naked yoga with toys. I mean, why not cash in on such a good thing. Have you ever seen a girl performing fellatio while in Bridge Pose? We could just call the offering “Sadie’s Cigar.” Make a goddamn mint!

  8. The P

    What wouldn’t the corporate world understand about the yoga fitness business? Who doesn’t travel for work these days in the corporate world anyway? Conferences, workshops, marketing trips, project meetings, client visits, etc. Sadie has more in common with the upper level movers and shakers in the business world who jet around the world making deals than some romantic ideal of a nomadic wanderer from an exotic land.

  9. Was the interview edited to shreds or does Sadie know what she’s saying? It’s so disjointed and all over the place to the point where it doesn’t even make sense.

    “Those super-posi actualizers of their own destiny, who first disassociate themselves from anyone who might get in the way of their personal success, and then couch the entire process in a slurry of “personal truths” and sustained eye contact.”—>welcome to the world of corporate brown-nosers who still want to come across as “spiritual”, whatever the fuck that means in those nebulous minds of theirs

  10. Wow this rant is on another level babes. Too funny, so many hilarious details. However I must rebuke a point:
    “Yoga peeps far more intense than you are getting drunk and smoking cigarettes right now, indoors, in front of children, next to a burning pile of trash.”
    That rings bullshit as much as the other bullshit you’re calling bullshit on. And it’s partially innacurate. Presumably Indian peeps, the ones sitting next to burning piles of trash might be beanie-sucking and bhang puffing but they’re not actually “yogis” anymore than their American counterparts fronting for some change. Whether its a pesa coin flicked into a turban-towel on a dusty corner or half a mil in a fancy rebel bank it’s the same cheating and calling it real.
    Phony nonsense. And drinking and smoking a cigar and promoting yourself that way as a (cool? rebellious? relevant?) yoga teacher? Delusionnnnnn.

    • With all due respect, I disagree. We don’t consider Sadie to be NOT a yogi. We just think her schtick is lame. A yogi’s “status” as “yogi” is between the practitioner and their maker, be it celestial or neurological. Society also plays a role in that decision as well, I suppose.

      • No, you’re not saying it. That’s why I am. Smoking and drinking (and then using it to promote your ‘brand’) is not yogic. There I said it. Shiva is a demo-God, didn’t you get that line in the Gita that says do as I say not as I (and the other Gods) do?
        Yea go head and smoke and drink, it’s your body, life and karma but don’t tell me that that’s yogic or berate those who protest it to be anything but illusion and delusion inciting.
        And I’m not pretentious. I’m just trying to keep it truthful. Health is superficial. Anything can be ‘unhealthy’. Just standing on a street corner breathing pollution is unhealthy. Who cares?! But indulging in intoxication and calling it yoga has nothing to do with controlling the senses, that little limb called pratyahara, to attain an authentic deeper connection, you know, “yoga”. Yea I get it, you’re not saying it does but saying its cool is just ignorant (like Shiva- mode of ignorance).
        Commenting on schticks alone is just a waste of time… Like u say, too easy!!

        • Garuda

          Pratyahara is the residue of pranayama. Dharana is the residue of Pratyahara. Dyana is the residue of Dharana. Samadhi is the residue of Dyana. Pratyahara as a practice is just a dogmatic circle jerk.
          Nobody here is claiming that alcohol or tobacco or Marijuana is a path unto itself. So it is just fine to enjoy these substances as long as you are not under the delusion that they are the end and not a means to an end.
          Much like saying to yourself “If only I do 108 sun salutations every day, the heavens will part”. But, that doesn’t stop the yoga hucksters from Bumfuck Arkansas from selling the finished product through calisthenics.
          The doors of perception are widely expanded through the use of THC. You cannot un ring that bell, much like the realization of Kundalini changes perceptions permanently. Sadie as a life model is not my cup of tea, but for some, I am sure, her tea fills their cup. Who are you to disclaim anything?

        • I AM THAT, I understand your sentiment, but I’m not saying that smoking and drinking *is* yoga. I suppose it can be, but again, that’s something to be sorted out between the person and the personal.

          The reason we comment on the schtick, is because the practice unfolds for each person on an incredibly personal level. It is not our place to make claims about one’s personal relationship to the practice. While there is much that can be debated with regards to what constitutes a true yoga practice or not, I’m not interested in that. I have been in the presence of many heart-fluttering yogic contradictions, BIG practitioners of great value and inspiration, enough to have humbled my view on what constitutes a right yogic path and a wrong one.

          This is why we stick to the schtick. We use that critique as a way of trying to open doors to other forms of discourse. See it as us coming in through the window. Like a cat burglar.

      • Yoga Whelp

        There’s some weird parallel perhaps between Sadie’s “schtick” and the works of several Impressionists, including Manet and Duez, who painted women seated in cafes, smoking and drinking alone, often staring off into space, bored and expectant, but basically “all dressed up with nowhere to go.” Feminists have argued for decades over whether these paintings – and others by Degas and Renoir — depict liberated women navigating the female social mores of their time. Some see them as reflections of female social confinement and ennui. For some, they are just portraits of barmaids and hookers awaiting their johns.

        Maybe that’s what a modern yogini like Sadie is — a bored and humorless female flaunting her independence through ostentatious but stationary displays of presence largely intended to attract the male gaze. Put that in your Sutras and smoke it.

    • agentpete

      Um… May I mention Lord Shiva who, word has it, is partial to a toke or three…

  11. novecho

    HAVE A SKYPE SESSION WITH SADIE to ROCK YOUR WORLD! Get her expert advice on yoga, teaching, marketing, relationships, your personal yoga practice, living from center, dealing with drama, freedom from suffering…or whatever you need!

    $75/hour. To schedule an appointment, email

    who mentioned pay porn?

  12. You’ve disarmed me with your cat burgled analogy.
    Garuda- I’m someone who is perfectly comfortable with disclaiming bullshit with the hopes of clearing the table for something more beneficial to education and awareness. And I know I’m up against a lot of people who are hung up on “non judgement” because real judgement has been misused and misapplied and now “anything goes”. Someone hoping timeless intelligence can be restored… Still refining my process. Bare with me.

  13. Yoga Whelp

    Listen to these two art critics review Manet’s famous painting, Plum Brandy — but instead look at Sadie’s photo. This is “enigmatic” smoking-and-drinking working class woman who makes her way within the polite confines of bourgeois society. The schtick, while hinting at rebellion and independence, reflects social confinement and boredom. These women are really just surviving, not thriving.

  14. amphibi1yogini

    Talk about cigars and odalisques, I’m waiting for pop yoga’s answer to Monica Lewinsky … maybe that’s on the horizon, yet!

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